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This post describes 3 homeopathic remedies to support different profiles of grief, separation and anxiety in parents as a result of a young person leaving home to go to boarding school or university.

Homeopathic remedies to support the separation process

I had a text from one of my clients asking what remedies I’d recommend for loss, when a child goes to University for the first time. It’d be the same scenario for a parent whose child went off to boarding school, in both cases one of your constant companions moves out of the family home and starts a term-time life which is separate. It’s a real adjustment, and in some ways might be easier for the child/young person as their time will be fully occupied with new exciting activities whereas you’re more likely to be sticking in the same routine – only now that routine has one less person in it. We’ll look at 3 different remedies, and 3 different perspectives on the momentous change you’re going through. So, let’s dive in and immerse ourselves in the remedy profiles of Arg nit, Ignatia and Pulsatilla.

IGNATIA

At times of acute grief Ignatia is the first remedy to consider. When you’re experiencing a roller coaster of emotions, 1 minute happy, the next OK and the next in floods of tears this is the place to turn. There’s a lot of contradictions in an ignatia state, so you might have a bit of a lump in your throat which feels worse when swallowing saliva and better for swallowing food or drink; or you might find yourself laughing uncontrollably at something very serious, have lost your sense of humour at a joke. Your appetite might be up and down too – either not wanting to eat anything at all, or wanting to comfort eat a lot. And company is the last thing on your mind, you’d rather be on your own, focusing on your grief.

PULSATILLA

Where there’s more of a feeling of abandonment and the last thing you want is to be alone then turn to Pulsatilla. There can be really easy crying with the least thing setting you off, but what you want more than anything is a hug and someone listening to how awful you’re feeling. Other people might find you uncharacteristically indecisive as you just can’t decide between different options. Physical symptoms you may experience include a queasiness around rich food, especially dairy, and a feeling you’ve developed a weak bladder. Warm, stuffy rooms make you feel like flinging a window open and you’d much rather be outside in the fresh air. You might also find you lose your thirst, but you’d probably quite enjoy someone else trying to encourage you to have a drink.

ARG NIT

If you’re the sort of person who’s kept quite tight control over your teen’s behaviour, what you might find hardest is the complete lack of control you’ll now have over their diet, the hours they keep, what they drink …. And where your teen has serious allergies this control developed because you had to keep them safe when they were growing up. Now you’re handing that control to them, and this can be a really anxious time, particularly if they’ve shown a reluctance to take that responsibility on for themselves. If you find you’re fussing around, moving from one activity to another without ever really settling and feeling a bit dizzy and anxious with your thoughts moving back recurrently to your teen’s issues and all the decisions they’ll need to be making then Arg nit would be a good bet for you.

There are no rights and wrongs when it comes to how we feel when our young people fly the nest, but it doesn’t pay to under-estimate its impact on us – just add up all the years we’ve had them around and all the support we’ve provided from birth onwards! Sometimes a shift like this can provoke a major life reappraisal, and if you feel like that’s you and you’d like some support shedding some of the responsibilities you’ve held for many years then get in touch, I’d be pleased to accompany you on your journey.

About Dorothy

Dorothy Watt is a homeopath, speaker and teacher. She runs a busy practice working with individuals and families who choose to support their wellbeing with homeopathy, and she loves teaching people how to take responsibility for their everyday health issues using homeopathy.